Botfotwod is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, fussy scorpion.

Botfotwod created snails two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Botfotwod, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Botfotwod, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Botfotwod's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Botfotwod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Always make sure there are no ants in a room before entering it.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.