Vilsogbig is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, tiresome capybara.

Vilsogbig created the Small Magellanic Cloud five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vilsogbig, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Vilsogbig, he will try to impress you with trees.

Vilsogbig's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Vilsogbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms brown.

2. You must love Vilsogbig.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never wear shirts.