Bonkbaptal is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, pitiless duck.

Bonkbaptal created the planet Mars nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkbaptal, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bonkbaptal, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Bonkbaptal's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Bonkbaptal's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Always treat ducks with great respect.

4. Do not wear silver on your body.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.