Xintansastadxinhasmathan Yimdonsin is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, prudent crocodile.

Xintansastadxinhasmathan Yimdonsin created the planet Venus seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xintansastadxinhasmathan Yimdonsin, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Xintansastadxinhasmathan Yimdonsin, he will turn you into a snail.

Xintansastadxinhasmathan Yimdonsin's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Xintansastadxinhasmathan Yimdonsin's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear kilts.

2. Put Xintansastadxinhasmathan Yimdonsin first in all things.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Respect your elders.