Bimbutxuck is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, almighty unicorn.

Bimbutxuck created the Sun five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bimbutxuck, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bimbutxuck, he will curse you with boils.

Bimbutxuck's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Bimbutxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Do not speak about spinach.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Always obey Bimbutxuck's priests.