Gupwabfod Gebmildosstarg is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, benevolent wolf.

Gupwabfod Gebmildosstarg created the world eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gupwabfod Gebmildosstarg, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gupwabfod Gebmildosstarg, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Gupwabfod Gebmildosstarg's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Gupwabfod Gebmildosstarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair fawn.

2. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never hurt nematodes.