Haksterfod is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, calm capybara.

Haksterfod created the world three million years ago.

If you believe in Haksterfod, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Haksterfod, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Haksterfod's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Haksterfod's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not kill seals.

5. Never pour water over plants.