Larpsitgud Tenabster is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, capable squid.

Larpsitgud Tenabster created vertebrates four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Larpsitgud Tenabster, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Larpsitgud Tenabster, he will boil you in a big pot.

Larpsitgud Tenabster's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Larpsitgud Tenabster's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Feed all hungry mice.

5. Never jump near snakes.