Tigkimstrag Rawbifhab is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, able goose.

Tigkimstrag Rawbifhab created Europe eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tigkimstrag Rawbifhab, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tigkimstrag Rawbifhab, he will not care.

Tigkimstrag Rawbifhab's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Tigkimstrag Rawbifhab's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat apples.

2. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.

3. Erect six silicon sculptures of Tigkimstrag Rawbifhab on top of important buildings.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never talk about gravity.