Nignillciss Dunsugpang Ominbam is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, charitable cobra.

Nignillciss Dunsugpang Ominbam created oxygen five million years ago.

If you believe in Nignillciss Dunsugpang Ominbam, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nignillciss Dunsugpang Ominbam, he will turn you into a goat.

Nignillciss Dunsugpang Ominbam's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Nignillciss Dunsugpang Ominbam's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Nignillciss Dunsugpang Ominbam.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never eat carrots.

5. Hide from indigo capybaras for they are unholy.