Larn is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, charitable hippopotamus.

Larn created tapeworms three billion years ago.

If you believe in Larn, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Larn, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Larn's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Larn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear gold on your body.

2. Do not eat tomatoes.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not chop down trees.