Gutdindonmap is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, humane chinchilla.

Gutdindonmap created a top quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Gutdindonmap, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gutdindonmap, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Gutdindonmap's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Gutdindonmap's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Always help tapirs in need.

3. Do not kill goats.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gutdindonmap.

5. Do not dye your hair gray.