Paggebmis Cutcangeb is a god.

She takes the form of a large, stupid finch.

Paggebmis Cutcangeb created the Milkyway seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Paggebmis Cutcangeb, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Paggebmis Cutcangeb, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Paggebmis Cutcangeb's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Paggebmis Cutcangeb's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat foxes with great respect.

2. Never hurt dogs.

3. Never feed onions to doves while wearing black shirts.

4. Never mention otters.

5. Do not stand on grass.