Fastamjipmob is a god.
He takes the form of a gargantuan, slow
jackal.
Fastamjipmob created dark energy eight trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Fastamjipmob, he will give you the power of flight.
If you do not believe in
Fastamjipmob, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.
Fastamjipmob's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.
Fastamjipmob's Holy Commandments1. Always pray immersed in water.
2. Never go into black rooms.
3. Always obey Fastamjipmob's priests.
4. Do not make images of living things.
5. Run away if three sheep approach from the south.