Nullcibfem is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, astonishing jaguar.

Nullcibfem created the universe eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nullcibfem, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nullcibfem, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Nullcibfem's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Nullcibfem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

3. Never bounce near capybaras.

4. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Do not take Nullcibfem's name in vain.