Ranzedbab Fotzedlarn is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, merciless lobster.

Ranzedbab Fotzedlarn created the planet Earth six billion years ago.

If you believe in Ranzedbab Fotzedlarn, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Ranzedbab Fotzedlarn, she will turn you into a plant.

Ranzedbab Fotzedlarn's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Ranzedbab Fotzedlarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Never sing in holy places.

5. Never bounce in the presence of geese.