Tiffonteendoblarg is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, duplicitous hyena.

Tiffonteendoblarg created Africa two billion years ago.

If you believe in Tiffonteendoblarg, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Tiffonteendoblarg, it will ignore you.

Tiffonteendoblarg's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Tiffonteendoblarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never go into turquoise rooms.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. You must love Tiffonteendoblarg.

5. Never talk about horses.