Dissbastmil is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, self-confident wren.

Dissbastmil created vertebrates two million years ago.

If you believe in Dissbastmil, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dissbastmil, he will try to impress you with trees.

Dissbastmil's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Dissbastmil's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Run away from pink shrews, for they are unholy.

3. Do not run in public.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.