Nulbotbif is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, staggering snake.

Nulbotbif created the planet Mars two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nulbotbif, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nulbotbif, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Nulbotbif's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Nulbotbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about voles.

2. Do not run in public.

3. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Nulbotbif on top of all buildings.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.