Jamhappin is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, contented skunk.

Jamhappin created the universe eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jamhappin, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jamhappin, he will be mildly annoyed.

Jamhappin's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Jamhappin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Always pray immersed in water.