Pigfunwigduttar is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, staggering jellyfish.

Pigfunwigduttar created life nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pigfunwigduttar, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Pigfunwigduttar, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Pigfunwigduttar's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Pigfunwigduttar's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Put Pigfunwigduttar first in all things.

5. Never pour water over plants.