Tarpgepgad is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, able chinchilla.

Tarpgepgad created vertebrates four billion years ago.

If you believe in Tarpgepgad, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Tarpgepgad, she will strike you with lightening.

Tarpgepgad's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Tarpgepgad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about parsnips.

2. Never talk about amino acids.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never paint your back fawn.