Baftonkjig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, resourceful gnu.

Baftonkjig created the Andromeda Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Baftonkjig, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Baftonkjig, she will jump up and down on your head.

Baftonkjig's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Baftonkjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not wear lead on your body.

3. Never hurt ducks.

4. Always look after injured tapirs.

5. Baftonkjig loves squirrels, so they must be honoured.