Vagdavfon is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, effective penguin.

Vagdavfon created viruses four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vagdavfon, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Vagdavfon, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Vagdavfon's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Vagdavfon's Holy Commandments

1. Always help manatees.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. You must pray to Vagdavfon six times a day.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never hurt snails.