Binlargbotbap is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, competent fairy.

Binlargbotbap created snails eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Binlargbotbap, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Binlargbotbap, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Binlargbotbap's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Binlargbotbap's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear purple shorts.

2. Never wear coats.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always wear turquoise.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.