Bodshavflabven is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, omnipotent ferret.

Bodshavflabven created dark matter three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bodshavflabven, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bodshavflabven, it will send you a sign.

Bodshavflabven's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Bodshavflabven's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Hide from gray goats for they are unholy.

4. Never think ill of sick dogs.

5. Always help sick mites.