Dotbitquim is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, generous cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Dotbitquim created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dotbitquim, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Dotbitquim, it will manifest in front of you.

Dotbitquim's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Dotbitquim's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silver sculpture of Dotbitquim on top of all buildings.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not dye your hair gray.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not shave your chest.