Jenmifmat is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, contented jackal.

Jenmifmat created dark energy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jenmifmat, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jenmifmat, he will laugh at you.

Jenmifmat's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Jenmifmat's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven iron sculptures of Jenmifmat on top of important buildings.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never talk about nebulae.

5. Do not speak about coconuts.