Sogstragortgongubrotfunjat is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, unthinking mole.

Sogstragortgongubrotfunjat created the Whirlpool Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sogstragortgongubrotfunjat, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Sogstragortgongubrotfunjat, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Sogstragortgongubrotfunjat's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Sogstragortgongubrotfunjat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill seals.

2. Never paint your face purple.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not commit murder.