Wapwatyatt is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, weak horse.

Wapwatyatt created the Sun two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wapwatyatt, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Wapwatyatt, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Wapwatyatt's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Wapwatyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt monkeys.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never talk about tortoises.

5. Never look in ponds.