Metlogbab is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, sapient giraffe.

Metlogbab created the solar system nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Metlogbab, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Metlogbab, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Metlogbab's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Metlogbab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Retreat if four horses approach from the east.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

4. Never jump in holy places.

5. You must pray to Metlogbab eight times a day.