Toffummeg Sugsatlit is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, temperamental gorilla.

Toffummeg Sugsatlit created the Cigar Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Toffummeg Sugsatlit, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Toffummeg Sugsatlit, it will boil you in a big pot.

Toffummeg Sugsatlit's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Toffummeg Sugsatlit's Holy Commandments

1. Put Toffummeg Sugsatlit first in all things.

2. You must pray to Toffummeg Sugsatlit four times a day.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Always help sick eagles.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.