Bigbassban is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, self-assured horse.

Bigbassban created silver six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigbassban, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bigbassban, he will turn you into a mouse.

Bigbassban's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Bigbassban's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate hamsters.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never talk about galaxies.