Fagomintab is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, irritating snail.

Fagomintab created the world eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fagomintab, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fagomintab, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Fagomintab's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Fagomintab's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never talk about tortoises.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.