Dossyogarf is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, strong mongoose.

Dossyogarf created the cosmos seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dossyogarf, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dossyogarf, it will turn you into a worm.

Dossyogarf's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Dossyogarf's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear black.

2. Always look after injured great tits.

3. Never wear gray jumpers.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Never play with disobedient children.