Nelsandhan is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, proud swallow.

Nelsandhan created a bottom quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Nelsandhan, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Nelsandhan, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Nelsandhan's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Nelsandhan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your head.

2. Never talk about asteroids.

3. Never wear kilts.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.