Yogbamfet is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, benevolent dolphin.

Yogbamfet created an up quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yogbamfet, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Yogbamfet, it will not care.

Yogbamfet's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Yogbamfet's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your hands indigo.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never go into turquoise rooms.

4. Never laugh in the presence of ants.

5. Never talk about cell theory.