Vegjopbonk is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, overgenerous narwhal.

Vegjopbonk created a down quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vegjopbonk, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vegjopbonk, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Vegjopbonk's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Vegjopbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always treat snails with great respect.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Never play with disobedient children.