Nakgomlik Padrotquafjin Cebtomzog is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, annoying walrus.

Nakgomlik Padrotquafjin Cebtomzog created the planet Earth four million years ago.

If you believe in Nakgomlik Padrotquafjin Cebtomzog, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Nakgomlik Padrotquafjin Cebtomzog, it will turn you into a slug.

Nakgomlik Padrotquafjin Cebtomzog's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Nakgomlik Padrotquafjin Cebtomzog's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from blue shrews, for they are unholy.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never write about asteroids.

4. Erect four copper sculptures of Nakgomlik Padrotquafjin Cebtomzog on top of important buildings.

5. Run away if three birds approach from the south.