Staflighamhudnarhigmat is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, astonishing sheep.

Staflighamhudnarhigmat created humankind seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Staflighamhudnarhigmat, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Staflighamhudnarhigmat, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Staflighamhudnarhigmat's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Staflighamhudnarhigmat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

2. Do not take Staflighamhudnarhigmat's name in vain.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never sit in the presence of ducks.

5. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.