Zanwadkam is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, capable otter.

Zanwadkam created energy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zanwadkam, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Zanwadkam, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Zanwadkam's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Zanwadkam's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Zanwadkam.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never talk about galaxies.

5. Zanwadkam loves porpoises, so they must be honoured.