Bonkpibxuc is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, moody parrot.

Bonkpibxuc created life seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bonkpibxuc, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bonkpibxuc, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bonkpibxuc's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Bonkpibxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Otters are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never eat bark.