Sanmannad is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, astonishing penguin.

Sanmannad created Europe seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sanmannad, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Sanmannad, she will curse you with boils.

Sanmannad's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Sanmannad's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt badgers.

2. Never go into yellow rooms.

3. Never wear tights.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.