Wadtadlen is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, deceitful sheep.

Wadtadlen created Africa six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wadtadlen, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Wadtadlen, he will turn you into a tree.

Wadtadlen's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Wadtadlen's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.