Riltanrutgod Logstragzod is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, unsympathetic centipede.

Riltanrutgod Logstragzod created the planet Saturn eight million years ago.

If you believe in Riltanrutgod Logstragzod, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Riltanrutgod Logstragzod, she will make you grow a tail.

Riltanrutgod Logstragzod's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Riltanrutgod Logstragzod's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

3. Never skip in the presence of goats.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Hide from purple tortoises for they are unholy.