Wikomtvon is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, fussy giraffe.

Wikomtvon created oxygen four years ago.

If you believe in Wikomtvon, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wikomtvon, he will think nothing of it.

Wikomtvon's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Wikomtvon's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bananas.

2. Retreat if three frogs approach from the south.

3. Feed all hungry hamsters.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always make sure there are no shrews in a room before entering it.