Japwanfag is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, awe-inspiring hare.

Japwanfag created carbon seven million years ago.

If you believe in Japwanfag, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Japwanfag, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Japwanfag's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Japwanfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Tapirs are not to be trusted.

3. Never wear coats.

4. Never paint your hands brown.

5. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.