Catnill is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, wise armadillo.

Catnill created Africa nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Catnill, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Catnill, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Catnill's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Catnill's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. You must love Catnill.

3. Always make sure there are no rats in a building before entering it.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate swans.

5. Never jump in the presence of snails.