Komjonjip is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, clever raven.

Komjonjip created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Komjonjip, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Komjonjip, it will jump up and down on your head.

Komjonjip's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Komjonjip's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Run away from white sheep, for they are unholy.

3. Never write about comets.

4. Never wear cyan coats.

5. Hide from brown whales for they are unholy.