Botgupboss Pinzenlat Femwapjat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, kind chinchilla.

Botgupboss Pinzenlat Femwapjat created Europe two million years ago.

If you believe in Botgupboss Pinzenlat Femwapjat, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Botgupboss Pinzenlat Femwapjat, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Botgupboss Pinzenlat Femwapjat's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Botgupboss Pinzenlat Femwapjat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Retreat if seven mites approach from the west.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.